I am trying to understand the claimed "black magic" placed on me years ago by who I think was my ex. He was to me the rare combination of being both suspicious of people and someone who liked to socialize. Before we even got to date it was as if he had from first moment he met me "brand" me as in him admitting his interest in me and wanting to take me out. It was so that our entire social group knew of his pursuit long before I gave him a chance, at least. He was connecting himself to me from early on. When we were a couple he was for a period acting as if he was proud and happy with me and he wanted me to do well in my future, in my career. Behind my back I would later find out he would get again suspicious and jealous of me and confront and sabotage other people he thought would somehow be his rival of me. None of these things he told me, it was for me to find out myself, through others, by chance. One time I left him and it upset him long after I had returned and as if he wanted to punish me for it somehow but still not wanting to risk loosing me over his punishment.
Years after our break up I would say the "black magic", if he is behind it, has been behaving pretty much like him, as it has been "personalized". The only times I get "punished" is when I have tried to break the connection, and then in fairly innocent ways, never violent, never any sexual assault, never anything like it. My main concern when I was his was for other people's safety if he now got it in his head somehow that they were a threat to us, or him. When he would ask me about someone I would get nervous for that reason alone. I know there were times he got mad at others as he thought they were in to make him look bad, and him somehow loosing me, and then I got more afraid what he might do to them than ever to me and tried to make him blame me for it.
Am I out of line if I see this strange pattern in the magic? Or are all spells "personalized" by the one doing it?
It sounds like it was an emotionally abusive relationship. I'm not sure that he's been cursing you, especially if he wasn't into magic when you two were together.
It's more likely psychological, as this has likely caused some trauma in how you view yourself. Being with someone so controlling and jealous harms your confidence and independence, and that might be what you're feeling right now.
From an energetic standpoint, look into cord cutting rituals and how to cleanse the self. I'd also get rid of any items he might have gifted you. Block him on all social media. Just scrub your life of him.
Then, I'd try to address how his control might have affected you psychologically. You could try looking into therapy, if that's available to you.
Brynbrown, thank you for the great advice. You are spot on when it came to the mental hold, the jewelry part and the social media!
But he did actually know about spiritual matters before he met me... but at the time I did not know he himself would be practicing any of it, but that he knew of people in his past that were. He would tell me so and try to show me. I could not be sure in what religion or spiritual path. I was not paying attention back then the way I today wish I had.
Then somehow he became a member of something where rituals, ceremonies are done, and this was a rather long process in itself.
I did seek professional advice as the relationship had gotten emotionally abusive and to not return to him.
