Healing my past wounds

First of all, I would like to stress that anxiety attacks can be caused by abnormal hormone levels, glucose levels, or heart problems. I personally suffered from anxiety attacks since I was six years old because I was born with a heart defect and it directly triggers fight or flight no matter how calm and relaxed I am. So not only do I control my mind, but also control my body. I'm actually an extremely laid back person to a point where some people think I am "cold". I'm truly not, I do care, I just do not wrap myself up in extreme negative emotion and people find that odd. I have conquered my condition.

Even though my problem is triggered by a physical defect of my heart valve (MVP), I have learned to control it through a healthy diet, enough sleep (naps if I have to), moderate exercise, and proper breathing. I have taken absolutely zero medication or suppliments for heart or anxiety and have improved both through healthy living to a point where I live a perfectly normal life (unless the temperature outside becomes too hot, then I have to go slow).

When I actually am extremely upset and have difficulty focusing (loss of a loved one, argument, etc) I use singing, chant or Buddhist mantras to bring myself back to a calm state. I taught myself through self control to let go of anger very quickly so that is never a problem. Life is too short to harbor negative emotions. Sorrow from loss is the only tough one, but thankfully that occurs with many years between them.

Don't get me wrong, this took me many years. I suffered greatly throughout my childhood and half my teen years, especially since drama was my family's middle name! At 9 years old I was rushed to an emergency room, and did they say "you have a heart problem?" No, they said "you're having an anxiety attack". I wasn't diagnosed with MVP until I was 16 years old and asked the doctor MYSELF to check my heart because heart problems run in my family and I came across in a book that anxiety was triggered by them. An ultrasound verified. Ten years of suffering and people believing I had some sort of mental problem when I was just a child with a heart valve defect! So please, please, go to a doctor and have them check you for an underlying cause. Doctors are terrible with treating symptoms and not causes.

And here is the biggest and hardest one. At best discard or at least avoid at length periods of interaction with people in your life who impact you in a negative way. Negative people will bring you down. Surround yourself with positive people.

You're right that doctors sometimes misdiagnose conditions.
I'm 99% sure my heart is fine because I was born with a life-threatening condition. I had to be operated on right after I was born, then several times as a baby.

Doctors ran every test they could, especially since my condition has been linked to heart problems.

ER doctors also checked me for epilepsy after I fell and hurt my head during a routine check-up (I fainted).

My condition doesn't affect my daily life. I have a pretty big scar (that I can cover with clothes, so it's fine) and I'm paralyzed in one eye, but apart from that, I'm fine.

What's been haunting me though are the operating tables flashbacks. I also have/ had a major phobia of doctors and hospitals, to the point that some doctors thought I was high when I had panic attacks. I also fainted in an ER, in a specialist's office, during a medical check-up when I was in junior high, when firemen where showing us how to do CPR (etc).

I conquered that particular fear by watching every single episode of Scrubs, then moving on to ER and Grey's Anatomy, and also watching surgeries on TV (plastic surgery).

I forced myself to look at the organs and the blood. I've never been afraid of blood, I'm just scared by anything that can harm me, and medical examinations.

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Now I'm left with a phobia of potentially dangerous things, the remnants of a fear of dogs, and a major phobia of college and exams.

I'd really like to try some spells or do some work with the Amethyst I have. I just don't know what to do.