(TL:DR- I need a spell to ease a troubled mind because my guy is close to a mental break.)
Hi all, I have a problem that I need help with. My guy is wrestling with some pretty major demons, due to some mental illness issues, a high number of personal deaths (his adopted mother, uncles, etc.)
Things in his mind have gotten so bad that he's decided to run off to Alaska in the winter to sort himself out. He also has this rigid honor code that dictates that he break up with someone in person. He decided, since he was going to be gone for an unknown amout of time and didn't know if he might have to break up with me while he's away. He says that he still loves me, cares for me, and wants to share his life with me, but we can't be together while he's gone.
I want him to stay, but not at the expense of his well-being. If he was just done with us, that would hurt, but I would understand. I can see how much he's suffering.
I need a spell to help him through this, and to hopefully make him stay.
I am sorry to say I know of no such spell. Having dealt with a similar situation and knowing that I will have to deal with it again, it would be nice to have a spell to fix it.
My situations were and will be different than his, though I do in many ways understand his thinking. One of the strongest people I know will walk away from the family he has created and loves more than anything when the woman that raised him passes. Though he will not go as far as Alaska, he will remove himself from the lives of his family so that he can grieve in a way that will work for him. He has done it before, when his birth mother died. His reason for doing this is that the lose will make him angry. He will want to scream and curse, hit things, and fight his inner 'demons' in his own way. Mostly he knows he will be an unstable mess and he would rather his sons not see him that way. His wife, bless her heart, is not fond of the idea. She hates it in fact. She feels that it is unneccessary and that the boys need to see their father grieve not 'run away'. She sees the leaving as a slap in the face to the family they have made. She does understand that he has had a rough go of it over the years. She wants him to be okay and has decided that it is probably best to let him grieve in his own way.
I'm not saying that the choice to leave is the right one, but trying to make him do what he doesn't want to do is not a good choice either. I understand that you love him and you want him to be okay. I understand that you don't (or probably don't) see how this is a good thing. I can tell you that if a man has a strong desire to do something when they feel they are 'losing it' and you force them to stop, the repercussions are severe and far worse than letting them go.
I can't advise you on how to handle the situation. I can only share the experience that I have had with a similar situation. I respect your man for having the courage and forethought to not leave you 'hanging' in a relationship with someone who is physically absent. He respects you and that is worth a lot.
