I'm really confused with my life. I been told from the day I was born, I was surrounded by a negative energy. It's been with me my whole life. I see today that it is true, I'm filled with hate, anger, jealously, and rage. I can't control the demon telling me to kill myself. No matter how happy I can be, I still feel this evil tugging at me. Letting me know Im not meant to be happy. I don't want whatever is inside me or around me to take over. It's horrible and I want a happy life. What can I do?
Many can relate to feeling lost, confused, or depressed. Talk to your doctor, maybe a councillor or psychiatrist to figure out if there's anything medically which can be done. Try keeping a journal for your thoughts or reading 'self-help' or other books/blogs intended to help you feel better.
Magickally, cleanse and protect yourself and your home. Research demons and figure out how to get rid of the one with you [not saying there is or not, but if so it's better to know all about it] when you finish the cleanse/banish/protection [you should probably recast it often since its been around so long] forget and move on. Worrying if you did it right creates doubt which can then allow negative energy to leak back in.
Trying to be happy when you're normally not is an uphill battle, but if you work on it, you can do it. You won't be happy every second of every day, but try to 'look on the bright side of life'. Try making a list of things that make you happy, when you feel down, pull out the list and read it, try to do the things on the list to feel better.
Nekoshema, and Thor always giving out advice. Listen to there words, they are extremely honest. Ever onward,
It's okay to feel sick, sad, jealous, ect on certain times. Heck no one will have a perfect, life. That's the way it is though.
Truth is, it's normal to have bad vibes off and on. The thing is, your having suicidal issues and that is becoming more common too. I can't stress this Enough! Talk to your family, doctor, therapist. Don't willow in misery, wishing you could be happy. Instead talk, and then fake it till you make it.
Try to cleanse your chakras, body, mind. Try meditation daily, and keep a Notebook. Write down any questions like why you want to die, ect. Write your daily routines, your hopes, you'll start to see routines and patterns and, maybe you could then fix it.
If you do have demons i really suggest, looking up how to get rid of them. I honestly doubt you do, but you probably just have negative energy. If that is the case...try doing happy work, volunteering, ect. Usually energy's can't be banished, but instead only shaped.
you are what you are deal with it, everyone has a personal hades (like the Greek hell not really shore on if i spelled it right) inside of them you can not overcome it till you embrace it, or that atleast worked for me, bow i might be just a little bit insane since doing it, i just don't sometimes understand humanity since coming back from my hades but what ever I'm cool with it
I have spoken to a Physic before, that's how I learned there is a negative energy around me, like I said since birth. I have tried to talk to others but no help, and I don't think a doctor will help. I really believe it's something in me that is wanting to come out and I don't want it to be bad. I will keep a journal and fill it with happiness. Just whatever it is I'm not happy. I can't even go inside a church without feeling highly uncomfortable. I will take all your advice and use it. Thanks
Sorry to hear about your struggles and I hope that you find peace soon. I know how difficult it can be to have such a negative energy clouding over you, but it will pass. I suggest that you learn to meditate and I'm sure that you will see that you will start to feel better in no time.