Hello, I am new and so excited I found this site. Because I live in a very small town of only 400 people, I am solitary & have been for many yrs. I always wanted to be a part of a Coven and maybe now though SOM I will be able to & I can feel complete.
My question is a very serious one about teasing & mocking. My very young adult children make remarks they think are funny but it is due to ignorance. However, my husband thinks it is funny to always make off-handed remarks that are just plain cruel.
When I ask him what vehicle I should take to work I will get something like "Well aren't you taking your broom?" Today I told him I was tired of the fly's & how do we get rid of them (we live on a farm) and he said: "Get our your wand"!
I have asked him many times not to make fun of my beliefs & how it is not funny and upsets me. He still finds his jokes funny. I can not do a spell to have him hold his tongue because, in order to do so, I must ask for his permission & that is a lost cause.
ANY help is greatly appreciated. So glad I found this site. It has been a lonely Witchy existence for the past 20 years. Now I finally have people who I can relate to :)
I agree. Thank you for your reply. It seems I am going to have to be more "stern" which is hard for me to do but very necessary in this case. I hope the right words come to me & that I can express them properly.
In any relationship, respect is one of those very important things. If he does not respect your beliefs, that can put a strain on things.
The same thing goes for your kids.
Of course, I would recommend approaching carefully. Ask questions rather than accusing. If your husband thinks he is being funny rather than scathing, then he may just need to realize his methods are being hurtful.
Revealing yourself is always a tricky thing. People get nervous and don't know what to say sometimes and maybe humour is the way they try to go. Think of a few snappy retorts or comebacks.
Get one of the electric Bug Bats from the Dollar Store for the flies and tell him "Here's my magic wand" Maybe give him a zap!
Anyway, I'm glad you found us here.
Thank you for your thoughts. Yes, he thinks he is funny. He is a jokester and it is not meant to hurt but it does. I will be careful, he is my best friend so I will talk to him as such. Thank you.
HA! Great idea! A little "zap" never hurt anyone! I tolerate a lot of his jokes but this is serious to me (to us all) and every once in awhile, He will get on a week-long teasing "Kick".. that Usually seems to revolve around when I do a good alter cleaning. I will have to just dust off the cobwebs, scrape wax & shine my silver when he is at work from now on so as to not give him any ammunition.
I feel the same way my family teases me about my interest in magic and supernatural etc. i know they think it's just for fun but I can't just help who I am
Re: How to deal with mocking? By: Spirit76 / Novice
Post # 10 Oct 02, 2017
it may also help to do some reflection on why it may be that his jokes bother you. I understand different people have different senses of humor, but sometimes there might be an underlying insecurity or lack of confidence that the jokes are poking at.
Whenever a person comes across something that is pushing at their buttons, it is wise to take some time to examine why. Most often anger appears in places where people feel vulnerable. If you can discover something at the root of your own reactions to the attempts at humor, it might help you find a new source of confidence and levity.
Personally I find it to be important for my own well-being to have a light heart about the things I do. I was one of those people in the center of the bully circle from year one up through to college so I had to learn to not take things very seriously as a matter of survival. So nowadays I can do things like put up a sign at the door of my altar room that says "Witch parking only, all others will be toad".
...or throw bunny ears on a 'laughing Buddha' statue.
...Or put a paper-shredder on my desk at work and lebel it the 'in' box.
People around me of course still see me as the 'weird' one who makes no sense and is a bit crazy. But they also see that I am happy and smiling and that I own that whimsical nature for all it's worth. So, ironically, the more I have accepted myself, the more that others accepted me too.
